STINKWEED PETE

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110 Words About... Re-Gifting

Mon Dec 14, 2009 3:03 PM EST

odd-news, cheap, christmas, gift, presents, white-elephant, regifting

By Stinkweed Pete

Birthdays, weddings, anniversaries... Christmas...

If there is a gift to be given, there is someone who is giving a gift that they already got.

Sometimes it's perfectly acceptable; like a mean, biker dude receiving a gift card from Bath and Body during a company party, who then "re-gifts" it to his wife.

Even crummy gifts have a re-gifting home in "White Elephant" style parties.

There are the gifts, though, that simply should not be re-given... but people are cheap.

"It's the thought that counts."

That's the historical response for any less than useful gift.

The question remains: Does the thought still count if it was meant for you, not from you?

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Stinkweed Pete

This year during a “Secret Santa” party at work, my wife received a bulky, lop-sided, obviously hand-made sweater.

A Christmas tree was depicted on the front and was adorned loosely with bows, bells, and buttons.

Since my wife did not know who it came from, and did not want to hurt any feelings, she commented on how great it was.

When she got it home, we had a good laugh at the choking hazard it presented to the kids and the fact that she couldn’t wash it or it would probably jam up the washing machine with trinkets.

I tried it on for a lark, and out of the sleeve popped a posty note.

To: So-and-so employee who works for my wife

From: Aunt So-and-so

Christmas 2007

I suppose there is a fine line between being “Thrifty” and being a “Complete Cheap@ss”.

12 votes

#1 - Mon Dec 14, 2009 3:04 PM EST

bonos_rama

Aw, I feel sorry for aunt so and so. LOL

Your wife, if she knits, could have unraveled the sweater and balled and reused the yarn. At least someone would get SOME use out of it. And that's being thrifty!

7 votes

#1.1 - Mon Dec 14, 2009 4:12 PM EST

Stinkweed Pete

Aw, I feel sorry for aunt so and so

I know!

Here's the kicker...

At first I thought maybe this girl just didn't have the cash to get one more gift... trying economic times... blah, blah, blah.

Then my wife informed me that the "Secret Santa" deal was voluntary... and participants were to bring a gift that cost $5-10.

This girl not only didn't chip in the promised minimum, but my wife said she received an ornament that was likely more in the $5 range, and traded it to some other girl who got a Starbucks gift card worth $10 (Girl who received the card didn't drink coffee)

So this cheapo sold out Auntie for a Mocha Latte and a half... And didn't have to do anything but re-wrap the crappy sweater.

Some people!

7 votes

#1.2 - Mon Dec 14, 2009 4:59 PM EST

chick76

That's hilarious. I had a friend that got a wedding gift from a family member that still had the original card in it. Might have been a good idea to remove the card before giving it to someone else, yes?

I actually think regifting is a good idea, as long as you know the person can use whatever the item is, and no one knows you are regifting. Try not to make it too obvious.

5 votes

#1.3 - Mon Dec 14, 2009 6:55 PM EST

Stinkweed Pete

still had the original card in it

Heh... heh...

BUSTED!

Thanks for the story chick76!

3 votes

#1.4 - Mon Dec 14, 2009 9:26 PM EST

Mosephus

Stink, that's too funny. I did receive 1/2 bottle of Brut once.

9 votes

#1.5 - Mon Dec 14, 2009 9:48 PM EST

Stinkweed Pete

Hah HAH!

That's the best one yet Mosehpus.

Kind of a "double whammy" there.

Thanks for the laugh buddy.

3 votes

#1.6 - Mon Dec 14, 2009 10:31 PM EST

frostyone

LOL!! Oh I hate re-gifting but I find myself having to do it this year. We were given a cherry pie and none of eat or even remotely like cherry pie so I'm going to be giving it to someone else rather than let it go to waste. Tell the wife I feel for her and that "it's the thought that counts" line only works if the giver actually put some thought into the gift.

1 vote

#1.7 - Mon Dec 21, 2009 5:46 PM EST

Dowser

Frosty, you are so very right!

only works if the giver actually put some thought into the gift.

Then, no matter what it is, you can be grateful that someone cared about you!

1 vote

#1.8 - Tue Dec 22, 2009 5:42 PM EST

frostyone

still though if someone gave me a half used bottle of Bruit I might have to rethink my relationship with them and wonder exactly what kind of thought the'd put into the gift ;)

2 votes

#1.9 - Tue Dec 22, 2009 7:48 PM EST

Dowser

I knew exactly what my former mother-in-law thought of me when she gave me 1/2 bottle of perfume! :-)

Funny thing, even then, it didn't hurt my feelings. It was more than she had ever given me before, so that was something. :-)

2 votes

#1.10 - Tue Dec 22, 2009 10:30 PM EST

frostyone

lol...Dowser you always see the best in people whether they deserve it or not.

3 votes

#1.11 - Wed Dec 23, 2009 4:52 AM EST

Kimberly-430040

lol...Dowser you always see the best in people whether they deserve it or not.

That is the best gift in itself. Stinky I think I am going to have to retract my statement about never having to re gift....Someone who I don't know all that well brought a gift in for me yesterday. The candle /home fragrance set he brought me smells more like bug spray than apple cinnamon...... ohhhh no, what to do? I really appreciate the fact he took the time to think of me but the smell makes my nose crinkle.One of my employees loves it, and said she burns that scent all the time. I just don't want anyone to think I am heartless but I don't think I would ever use it.

1 vote

#1.12 - Wed Dec 23, 2009 11:13 AM EST

Spooky Boyfriend

"...there must be a pony around here somewhere!..."

1 vote

#1.13 - Wed Dec 23, 2009 12:36 PM EST

Dowser

Thanks, frosty! In her case, I had to be grateful for any small crumb of niceness. :-)

1 vote

#1.14 - Wed Dec 23, 2009 6:27 PM EST

frostyone

well you are much better than I am. I'd have pranked her....hard.

1 vote

#1.15 - Wed Dec 23, 2009 9:08 PM EST

Dowser

Couldn't do that.... a Catch 22 situation. Glad I don't have to deal with that anymore. Things could be a lot worse. :-)

1 vote

#1.16 - Wed Dec 23, 2009 9:13 PM EST

robynlewisTX.

LOL! I've never re-gifted, I'd be too afraid that I'd get busted. (plus I don't want to give anyone any of my stuff ;})

My sister has given me gifts that she didn't like, but I did, but it never bothered me.

That sweater though, that was bad, gotta admit. There's no excuse for that.

3 votes

#2 - Mon Dec 14, 2009 3:31 PM EST

Stinkweed Pete

I'd be too afraid that I'd get busted

Heh... heh...

Wouldn't that be the worst?

"Hey, this crappy sweater looks a lot like the one I gave to your Auntie three years ago."

3 votes

#2.1 - Mon Dec 14, 2009 5:02 PM EST

bonos_rama

Regifting should only be done if you know for a fact the original person could never find out! And only if the gift is decent to begin with! For instance, in cases where you already have one (like a toaster, food processor, etc.)

Never give someone something you wouldn't buy to begin with...

6 votes

#3 - Mon Dec 14, 2009 4:14 PM EST

Stinkweed Pete

Agreed.

3 votes

#3.1 - Mon Dec 14, 2009 5:04 PM EST

Dowser

I agree with this one, 100%. Only if you have two of them and it is a gift you'd give anyway. Yep, good idea.

Great article, Pete!

3 votes

#3.2 - Mon Dec 14, 2009 10:40 PM EST

Stinkweed Pete

Thanks Dowser :)

3 votes

#3.3 - Mon Dec 14, 2009 10:53 PM EST

ricksuth

Is it okay to give the used one and keep the new one? ;)

4 votes

#3.4 - Tue Dec 15, 2009 8:25 AM EST

Dowser

Nyah... but I've been tempted...

3 votes

#3.5 - Tue Dec 15, 2009 6:45 PM EST

neenie1991

I've done that with husbands.

4 votes

#3.6 - Tue Dec 15, 2009 7:53 PM EST

Dowser

lol!

3 votes

#3.7 - Tue Dec 15, 2009 9:06 PM EST

Stinkweed Pete

I think ex husbands and wifes are more "hand-me-downs" than "re-gifts".

2 votes

#3.8 - Fri Dec 18, 2009 4:44 AM EST

Dowser

I don't know, Pete-- one man's trash is another man's treasure...

I'm an ex, and I married an ex, and I know I'm fortunate!

2 votes

#3.9 - Fri Dec 18, 2009 12:43 PM EST

frostyone

That's good advice boons. :)

2 votes

#3.10 - Mon Dec 21, 2009 5:47 PM EST

cuzzenbud

I’m notoriously cheap. Although I’ve never regifted a gift to someone else, I think this is something I could do without any hesitation. Problem is; no one ever gives me any gifts!

8 votes

#4 - Mon Dec 14, 2009 4:30 PM EST

Stinkweed Pete

Hey cuzz!

no one ever gives me any gifts

Well, I promise if anyone re-gifts me a crummy violin, I'll play a sad song for you ;)

Thanks for checkin' in buddy.

7 votes

#4.1 - Mon Dec 14, 2009 5:08 PM EST

frostyone

hey cuzzenbud come on over and I'll let you have a cherry pie. It looks like it would be good but since we don't like cherry pies we wouldn't know first hand.

2 votes

#4.2 - Mon Dec 21, 2009 5:49 PM EST

K-joy

I say regift!! If it isn't something that you like, it may be right up someone else's alley, let them have it! I like to call it recycling.

6 votes

#5 - Mon Dec 14, 2009 4:42 PM EST

Stinkweed Pete

Hey K-joy-

Need a sweater?

Thanks for the comment :)

4 votes

#5.1 - Mon Dec 14, 2009 5:12 PM EST

K-joy

LOL...I will pass on the sweater and revise my re gifting rules: you should regift in the same year as the original gift. Bad gifts should not linger like the fruitcake in back of the fridge!

5 votes

#5.2 - Tue Dec 15, 2009 10:26 AM EST

ricksuth

K-Joy, that is a good way of looking at it, recycle. That is the way of today. But I remember in the days of ol' "One mans garbage is another mans treasure" Is that the same?

2 votes

#5.3 - Tue Dec 15, 2009 9:31 PM EST

Pvt-Public

One mans/womans trash is another mans/womans treasure! ;)

4 votes

#5.4 - Wed Dec 16, 2009 7:42 AM EST

K-joy

How PC are we! lol Go green with your gifts, everyone is doing it! hahahaha

2 votes

#5.5 - Wed Dec 16, 2009 9:43 AM EST

Upscheidt Creek

You need to be very carefull about re-gifting! Back in 1965 money was very scarce in my life and I had two little babies to raise. I had a wedding shower gift to buy for a special friend so I scrimped and did without and went to J.C. Penney's and bought her a very nice set of sheets and pillowcases.....something I couldn't possibly afford to buy for my own use. I was so proud to give her such a nice gift. The following year she and I was at a shower for another person and when the bride- to- be opened her gift from my friend....there was the set of sheets that I had done without in order to buy for my friend. I was so hurt that I went to the restroom and cried, but never let on to my friend that she had just broke my heart.

7 votes

#6 - Mon Dec 14, 2009 5:43 PM EST

Stinkweed Pete

Wow, bummer Upscheidt Creek.

Who doesn't need extra bedding? Jeez!

I wonder if your friend forgot where she got them from?

Right in front of you... not cool.

Oh well, thanks for the story.

PS - I would have kept the sheets :)

5 votes

#6.1 - Mon Dec 14, 2009 9:31 PM EST

Upscheidt Creek

No, she did not remember who had gave them to her. She would never have intentionally hurt my feelings for anything! We are still very close (45 years later) and to this day she doesn't know that she gave away the gift that I gave her. I got to thinking about it after I posted....she was probably struggling as much as I was during those early years and may not have had the money to buy a gift.... thus the re-gifting.

4 votes

#6.2 - Mon Dec 14, 2009 11:30 PM EST

Dowser

See what a good and loving friend you are, Upscheidt? You understood what may have been happening in your friend's life, and forgiven her completely.

Gosh, I wish you were my friend. :-)

5 votes

#6.3 - Mon Dec 14, 2009 11:40 PM EST

Stinkweed Pete

I agree with Dowser... Although, I don't think I could/would be such a good friend.

All it would take would be a few cocktails and I would be all over 'em...

"Hey... remember those sheets I gave you... Who doesn't need more sheets?"

"Sheet head!"

Thanks again for the story Upscheidt.

Happy Holidays!

2 votes

#6.4 - Fri Dec 18, 2009 4:57 AM EST

Dowser

You're a WONDERFUL friend, Pete!

I can attest to that fact!

3 votes

#6.5 - Fri Dec 18, 2009 12:44 PM EST

Kate In Greensboro

In my opinion, once a gift has been received, it belongs to the recipient who is then free to do with it as they desire, so there is nothing wrong with regifting. I think it is sensible to think (carefully!) before regifting, to avoid hurting the feelings of the original gift giver, but why keep a gift that doesn't suit you?

5 votes

#7 - Mon Dec 14, 2009 6:50 PM EST

Stinkweed Pete

You're right Kate.

But like you said, be careful.

If we've learned anything so far it's check the sleeves for posty notes, check the box for a card, and don't re-gift something right in font of the person who gave it to you.

Of course, if it's real bad, might be better to put it in the AmVets bag or take it to the Goodwill and re-gift it that way... that's where the "Christmas Tree Sweater" is going.

Thanks for stoppin' by.

5 votes

#7.1 - Mon Dec 14, 2009 9:39 PM EST

GoldenGateMami_Susi

I think I did the best re-gifting ever.

My ex-husband's mistress is now his wife.

:-)

8 votes

#8 - Mon Dec 14, 2009 8:41 PM EST

Stinkweed Pete

Hey Susi!

Heh... heh...

Just out of curiosity was the "gift" just useless to you, or was it ugly... or both?

I have an ex too, and I'm not sure I would consider what her new husband is probably dealing with a "gift". ;)

5 votes

#8.1 - Mon Dec 14, 2009 9:44 PM EST

GoldenGateMami_Susi

We were just wrong for each other in so many fundamental ways. A couple utterly mismatched to be under the same roof once the sailor came to shore.

You know you're in trouble when traveling the length of the entire California coast, Oregon and half-way up Washington with about 5 words exchanged the entire trip.

So wrong we can't even be friends. So wrong he found it necessary to put his new wife and her family ahead of his daughter. The list goes on.

Good person. I hold no ill will towards him but he's just better off where he's at now.

Well, it's a gift to you......look at it that way. :)

3 votes

#8.2 - Mon Dec 14, 2009 10:00 PM EST

Stinkweed Pete

Hmmmm...

"Divorce is the gift you give yourself."

I'm sure we're not the first to come up with that, but there's got to be some speciality law firm out there looking for a good, seasonal campaign slogan. ;)

Thanks for the comments Susi... good to hear from you.

5 votes

#8.3 - Mon Dec 14, 2009 10:29 PM EST

GoldenGateMami_Susi

Well depending on the situation, sometimes it can be the best gift you can give yourself and your kids (if there are any).

At the end it was not only the best but the necessary 'gift' that was needed for myself and my daughter.

Seasonal campaign slogan? LOL. Didn't think there were divorce seasons....;-)

You're welcome Stinkweed.

4 votes

#8.4 - Mon Dec 14, 2009 10:33 PM EST

Kimberly-430040

I never re gift. If it is something I will never use, but might be useful to someone else I donate it to a local mission. I'm pretty easy to figure out when it comes to buying gifts for, so I hardly ever get anything I don't like or cant use.

5 votes

#9 - Tue Dec 15, 2009 5:08 PM EST

ricksuth

Kimberly #### - all kidding aside that is a very noble pattern of thought and action. I really do agree. My wife and myself often give things we no longer need or use (I keep asking her why we bought it to begin with, but I digress) to Good Will or the local Christian center. I kinda make me feel good.

3 votes

#9.1 - Tue Dec 15, 2009 9:41 PM EST

Dowser

A lot of our stuff goes down the road to the Goodwill. Or the DAV. If it can help someone, so much the better!

3 votes

#9.2 - Tue Dec 15, 2009 11:24 PM EST

Stinkweed Pete

Yep, if you can't use it that doesn't mean that someone esle can't.

We do the same thing Kim, ricksuth, Dowser... I still think that's (by far) the best way to re-gift.

Thanks for the comments and Happy Holidays!

2 votes

#9.3 - Fri Dec 18, 2009 4:48 AM EST

Spooky Boyfriend

At the holiday par-tay I recieved a 12" hand painted resin-cast of a Santa wearing board shorts, holding a swallow tale surf board and a lil' sun-burned nose. As I recieved the gift, I spoke to the figurine.

"You are so being re-gifted."

2 votes

#10 - Mon Dec 21, 2009 5:53 PM EST

frostyone

Well as much as I hate regifting I can't say I'd blame ya on that one...lol

3 votes

#10.1 - Mon Dec 21, 2009 5:59 PM EST

Kimberly-430040

I think it sounds cute!!!!!

1 vote

#10.2 - Wed Dec 23, 2009 12:46 AM EST

frostyone

it'd be cuter by far if it was a Frosty with a burnt nose carrot. :)

1 vote

#10.3 - Wed Dec 23, 2009 4:53 AM EST

Kimberly-430040

Frosty that would be cute....When I go somewhere tropical I try to pick up a tropical type Christmas ornament from the place I am vacationing. I have several glass ornaments on one of my Christmas trees that depict Santa surfing, sunbathing or drinking a tropical drink. I even have Santa in a grass skirt doing the native dance....but no Snowmen with sunburns or toasted carrot noses!

2 votes

#10.4 - Wed Dec 23, 2009 11:21 AM EST

frostyone

Snowmen just don't get the press that Santa does. I guess that's why we don't have a good merchandising dept. ;)

2 votes

#10.5 - Wed Dec 23, 2009 4:23 PM EST

gonetoosoon

This is not a re-gifting story in the truest sense but it does generally fit the category. Several years ago my sister gave me a really nice toaster oven for Christmas. I was in the Army at the time and was on my way to a new post in Germany. Having been there before I knew my 110/120 volt appliances were pretty much useless. I packed the oven (package unopened) in storage. My sister understood the situation and it never caused a problem. However, shortly after I returned to the US (about 3 years later) my sister's house caught fire and burned to the ground. Family and friends pitched in to help her re-establish herself in a rental apartment. I was still unpacking from my return home and without thought I collected some items from my storage unit and brought them over to her apartment. Tucked into a box of kitchen supplies was (you guessed it) the still unopened toaster oven. Although my actions were meant to be helpful, returning the still unopened toaster oven really hurt my sister's feelings. I should have been more thoughtful and at least opened the oven and told her it was only a loan. Or maybe I should have kept the oven and given her my older oven. I learned a very valuable lesson; no matter how well the intention is, re-gifting (even when the recipient is down and out) can be a really bad idea.

1 vote

#11 - Sat Jan 9, 2010 10:28 AM EST

Kate In Greensboro

Although my actions were meant to be helpful, returning the still unopened toaster oven really hurt my sister's feelings. I should have been more thoughtful and at least opened the oven and told her it was only a loan.

I can't help but think that maybe your sister's reaction was more from all the emotion around losing her home to a fire than the return of the unopened gift; I don't think you should feel any guilt.

2 votes

#11.1 - Sat Jan 9, 2010 11:04 AM EST

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STINKWEED PETE

110 Words About... Re-Gifting

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